January 10th - January 16th
Am I upset when I completely screw up a recipe? Always. But it's more complicated than that. It's a mix of baking emotions that are similar to the stages of grief. Let me explain.
More nights than not, I take a bath. A long deep condition, face mask, "are you alive in there?" bath. I bring my phone (don't worry I have done this forever) and I read newsletters, catch up on social media, and watch videos. This is one of the highlights of a childless quarantine life - a designated time every evening to do whatever I want. During this Sunday's bath, I watched Sohla El-Waylly make pound cake. She swirled a basic vanilla pound cake with matcha, berries, and cocoa powder creating stunning loaves. I was inspired. I spent the next 12 hours thinking of different loaf cake flavor ideas and landed on a raspberry lemon swirl. I had used dehydrated raspberries a few weeks prior in meringue cookies and envisioned them adding flavor and a beautiful pink color to the cake, similar to the meringues.
A pound cake is made by creaming butter and sugar in a stand mixer, adding eggs, and alternating wet and dry ingredients. Voila, this is the creaming method. I spent Monday morning reviewing 17 different pound cake recipes all using the creaming method. The funny thing with recipes, and I find this to be especially true with baking, is that they are all the same. Baking is a science and recipes are composed of the perfect amount of each ingredient to react in a certain way. Ingredient quantities may vary slightly but they are all pretty much the same. So after a few hours of reading, research, and a quick stop to the grocery store I made a pound cake. My plan was to split the batter in half, flavor one with reduced lemon juice, and the other with raspberry powder. Into a loaf pan, I swirled the flavors together and popped it in the oven.
During that time I went downstairs and did a workout perfectly timed to finish right at the baking halfway mark so I would be able to peak at the progress. At 30 minutes, I checked to see how things were going. Squatting in front of the glass with my face pressed as close as possible I whispered "it hasn't risen enough and things are not going as planned!!!" This is where the first emotion sets in, stress. At this point, it was in, and there was nothing I could do to save it. I spent the next 30 minutes stressing, disappointed already, and reviewing all the details to see where an error could have occurred. At the 60 minute mark, it was clear we had real issues. The decorative lemons arranged on the top were on the edge of burning and the center was clearly not set. Option A) pull it from the oven accepting defeat with an underbaked cake or B) let the center fully set and accept a slightly burnt exterior, hoping to have a successful interior. I chose the latter, taking a risk, and living on the edge with burnt lemons. Working in 10-minute intervals, I paced back and forth as I watched the lemons get darker and darker. When the center was finally set and I pulled it from the oven the next emotion hit, sadness. It was a failure. Depending on how invested I am in a project I will usually spend about 30 minutes to 2 hours incredibly bummed and telling myself that I am the failure. In extreme cases, this can last 24+ hours but that only happens on rare occasions.
*Ask Marco the story about where I laid on the kitchen floor sulking about a failed challah.
The next emotion is one that I have brought on myself, total embarrassment. I have chosen to share every step of my cooking on Instagram and now I had to post a sad cake failure for everyone to see. Sharing my imperfections and opening myself to be judged by the whole world - what if they also think I am the failure?! This passed quickly because one thing I am good at is laughing at myself. I fucked up, oh well, I posted the ugly picture anyway.
After I have aired my flaws to my followers, I can move on. Que acceptance, where I turn my failure into a learning lesson and figure out what the hell went wrong. I'm a perfectionist, I'm obsessive, and I need things to work. The wheels start turning and I have to figure things out because I have to have a successful raspberry lemon swirl loaf cake.
While creaming my butter and sugar I stepped away to let a plumber in, who was scheduled to fix a leak in the downstairs bathroom. My butter was over creamed. I knew it when I returned but proceeded anyway. This resulted in a denser and slightly oily cake. Plus I think it could have benefited from a smidge more flour. Two things that can easily be corrected and should create a successful cake next time. So yes, I was upset with the outcome on Monday, I felt all the emotions but my mistakes will help others learn. That was test one and we will try again next week.
For the sake of recipe testing, I poisoned Marco this week with a little garlic. I tested my recipe for Fra Diavolo sauce. Fra Diavolo translates to devil brother. A spicy tomato sauce that pairs well with almost every seafood. I have been tossing it with spaghetti and testing different proteins. On New Year's Day we had Lobster Fra Diavolo and this week we had grilled shrimp. Both were fantastic. Marco preferred the lobster and I liked the shrimp ๐คท๐ผโโ๏ธ.
The heat in Fra Diavolo should be subtle. The type of heat that gently coats your tongue instead of being so intense it slaps you in the face. Don't be fooled, this sauce is made with Calabrian chilis and is spicy but the other flavors in the dish are very present. You can find Calabrian chilis in oil at the grocery store, this is what I use. Save the oil that they come in for drizzling and cooking with later. It is loaded with heat and flavor.
I tested this dish with the addition of fennel. I didn't find it added much and have left it out of the final recipe. If you have fennel at home, or really love fennel, feel free to add some. It won't hurt the dish. And for all my garlic lovers, add an extra clove or two. I went easy on the amount I used to save Marco from itching for two days. Next up I will be trying this sauce with clams and mussels. Full report on that to come soon.
Any time you make lobster or shrimp at home, save the shells and tails! Pop them in a plastic bag and freeze them. When you have collected a good amount, let's say a quart ziplock bag full, simmer them to make seafood stock. I make mine simple: onion, celery, carrot, thyme, bay leaf, and peppercorns. Cover everything with about 2 quarts of water and simmer until reduced by half. Strain the stock and freeze it in 1 cup deli containers until you are ready to use it. That what I use in my Fra Diavolo and the flavor is incredible.
This week on Instagram I made a clean out the fridge recipe on my story - Potato Bacon + Leek Soup. You can watch it go down in my highlights, here.
Here is the recipe:
โข 4 pieces of bacon (about 6oz), diced โฃ
โข 2 leeks + 1/2 onion OR 4 leeks *Don't forget to wash them! โฃ
โข 3 celery stalks, thinly sliced โฃ
โข 4 Yukon gold potatoes (about 2#), diced into bite-size pieces โฃ
โข 2 bay leavesโฃ
โข 2 sprigs fresh thyme or 1/2t driedโฃ
โข 1/2 bunch of spinach โฃ
โข 6 cups broth โฃ
โข LOTS of fresh scallions and parsleyโฃ
โฃ
*Optional creme fraiche, sour cream, or goat cheese crumbles โฃ
โฃ
1. In a large pot or Dutch oven, cook your diced bacon until crisp. Transfer to a plate and leave about 2T bacon grease in the pot. โฃ
2. Sautee leeks and celery over medium/medium-low heat until they start to pick up color for about 6 minutes. Add celery and cook for a mother 2 minutes until they soften. โฃ
3. Add broth, bay leaves, thyme, potatoes, half of the cooked bacon, and a big pinch of salt. Bring to a boil, reduce to a low simmer, cover and cook until potatoes are soft. 20ish minutes. โฃ
4. Add spinach and cook until wilted. Season with pepper and more salt if needed. โฃ
5. Ladle into bowls. Serve with L O T S of sliced scallions and parsley, reserved cooked bacon crumbled on top, and a dollop of creme fraiche, sour cream, or cheese! โฃ
I ended the week with a loaf of challah. I haven't made a loaf since before Thanksgiving! I rolled the strands in what I'm calling "Ramps & Seeds Seasoning." Dried ramps, garlic, poppy seeds, sesame seeds, and salt. It has everything bagel vibes. My loaf baked beautifully, the flavor was incredible, but it got a smidge too dark. I love challah but I think I'm ready for a new long-term project.
Recipes From This Week:
Thing Everybody Needs:
I am a fan of pickles. Big fan. These spicy bread and butter pickles from Suckerpunch are pretty tasty and worth trying. I always have some in the fridge!
Animal Cuteness:
Chaz in the snow.
Random Thing From This Week:
It's citrus season! I dove in head first this week with a citrus salad. Composed of pomelo, grapefruit, navel oranges, blood oranges, mandarins, pomegranate seeds, arugula, pistachios, and shallots. Let the shallots sit in red wine vinegar with a little honey for 10+ minutes before adding the shallots to the salad. Drizzle the red wine vinegar honey mixture over the top along with olive oil. Finish with salt and pepper.
Other ways to embrace citrus
Spa water, lots of spa water
Eat half a grapefruit with sugar sprinkled on top
Make a batch of Lemon Drop Cookies
Homemade marmalade
Stuff I Learned This Week:
If you haven't heard of the TikTok tortilla challenge, are you living under a rock?! You create four quadrants, make a slit halfway, and fold it into a triangle. It is a genius way of eating anything inside of a tortilla. Check out this video to see how to fold it up and give it a try!!
Book I'm Cooking Through This Month:
Where Cooking Begins, Carla Lalli Music
Recap + review 1/31
More raspberry lemon loaf tests to come!!
See you next week,
Marcella
Ways to support this artist in residence: